


Mission Improbable

by parenthetic (renaissance)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Middle School, Espionage, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-02
Updated: 2015-08-02
Packaged: 2018-04-12 13:41:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4481390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/renaissance/pseuds/parenthetic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a thrilling tale of Machiavellian espionage and forbidden romance, world-class spy Agent K ventures into enemy territory to perform reconnaissance on his agency's competition and emerges with more than he bargained for.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mission Improbable

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly this is my favourite of all my SASO fills. The prompt was: "I never even got her e-mail address!" – Spy Kids 3D: Game Over
> 
> This was so much fun to write! I hope you have just as much fun reading it!

A fifteen minute wait for a bus in the sweltering summer heat is not a good idea even when you’re wearing summer clothes, singlets and shorts and sandals, but it’s a worse idea when you’ve got on a hoodie and a trucker cap pulled down so that the edges of the brim are touching your sunglasses.

Aone gives Kenji a glare. He doesn’t talk much, but luckily Kenji is more than adept in the Art of Aone—Aone, right now, is pissed off. Kenji sort of doesn't blame him, though it’s not Kenji’s fault that Aone took “wear a disguise” a bit too seriously and is swathed in five different types of polar fleece, or something.

“I promise it’ll be worth it,” Kenji says.

He’s still got his hoodie tied around his waist, but the moment they’re within a five-kilometre radius of Karasuno it’s going over his head. Aone has his hoodie on already. He looks kind of like a tall penguin, the way he’s moving so uncomfortably.

“You don’t need to come in with me,” Kenji says, as though it’s some small consolation prize for Aone wearing fleece in the middle of summer.

“You’ll hurt yourself if I don't,” Aone says.

“I’m not going to—!” Kenji splutters, elbowing Aone. “Hey! I’m not—what are you implying, huh?”

Aone shrugs.

“You can stay outside,” Kenji reiterates. “Your mission, should you choose to accept it,”—he pauses for effect as the bus pulls up,—“is to give me a boost on your shoulders and over the wall.”

“How do you know there’s a wall?” Aone asks, giving the driver his fare.

“Duh,” Kenji says, “I’m a spy. You think I didn’t check the place out before planning this?”

A few people on the bus give them funny looks as they settle into a double seat, but at this time of day it’s mostly oldies and mums with newborns. An old lady in the seat on the other side of the aisle throws Kenji a straight-up dirty when he sits down, and he sticks his tongue out at her.

“Boys your age should be in school at this time of day!” she says.

“F-Y-I, we had an athletics carnival which let out early,” Kenji says. Also, he’s thirteen, and she shouldn’t be talking to him like he’s a little kid. “Also, nobody asked you,” he adds.

The old lady, suitably scandalised, turns away, so Kenji can settle down and go through the plan one more time. Aone nods exactly when he’s supposed to, and five kilometres before Karasuno Kenji puts on his hoodie—stupidly, though, he forgets to take his cap off first, and gets tangled up for a few very awkward moments.

At last, the bus pulls up across the road from the school, and Kenji springs into action.

“Okay, Agent T, are you ready?” he asks.

Aone stares at Kenji.

“Come on,” Kenji says, “you have to say, ‘Yes, Agent K!’”

“No I don’t,” Aone says.

“Okay, like, technically you don’t,” Kenji says. “Whatever, doesn’t matter. I need your superhuman strength to boost me over that wall.”

The wall in question is about half Kenji’s height, but that’s not the point. Aone dutifully lets Kenji use him as a stepping stone.

“You’re gonna wait?” Kenji asks.

Aone gestures across the road.

“Okay,” Kenji says, “I’ll come back to you when I’ve completed the mission.”

By now, school’s out, and there are a few students around so Kenji sticks behind buildings—it’s not hard to follow the sound of volleyballs to the gym. It’s not as big as Datekou’s gym, but that doesn’t mean anything. Karasuno were supposedly a championship team a few years back, and there are rumours about their first years—although nothing like the rumours about Datekou’s second years, most of which Kenji started himself. 

Next to the gym, there are some bushes, and it’s not hard for Kenji to push apart the branches and carve out a perfect niche for himself. He’s tall, so it’s a bit cramped, but nothing his legs can’t handle. Plus, he picked out his camo pants especially in case of this sort of situation. A good spy is always prepared.

Unfortunately, the one problem with spying from outside the gym is that there’s no way of seeing inside the gym. Kenji was hoping to get a glimpse of some of the players, at least to see how tall they were, but everyone is inside. He ducks his head down between his knees and frowns at himself. This was a stupid idea, and he should just get out of the bush, head back to Aone, catch the bus home—

“Um, hello?”

Kenji’s neck jerks up so fast that his cap gets caught in the branches and comes off. There’s a boy kneeling in front of him wearing trainers, gym shorts, and a shirt with “KARASUNO VBC” written in the corner. He’s kinda cute, too, like the kind of boy Kenji’s mum is always pointing out and saying, “Why can't you be more like him?”

“Hello,” Kenji says, trying to sound calm, like he isn’t hiding in a bush behind a gym at a school he doesn’t even go to.

“Are you a spy?” the Karasuno boy asks.

Kenji swears under his breath. “Who blew my cover?”

“No-one,” the boy says. “I guessed. I’ve seen a lot of spy movies, you know.”

“Oh,” Kenji says.

“Do you, maybe, want to get out of the bush?” the boy asks.

“I’m fine,” Kenji says.

The boy shrugs and plops down so that he’s sitting cross-legged. “If you’re sure,” he says. “So why are you spying here?”

Kenji decides that since his cover’s been blown, he might as well be honest. He takes his sunglasses off and hangs them off the neck of his hoodie. “I go to Datekou,” he says. “We’re matched up against you guys in the first round of Inter High.”

“So you wanted to size up the competition, huh?” the boy says, rubbing the back of his head. “There’s not much to see here, I’m afraid. It’s a bit of a waste of a good disguise.”

Without warning, he reaches forward and grabs Kenji’s cap from amongst the branches. Kenji lets out a yell and sticks an arm out to reclaim his cap, but the boy jumps to his feet, forcing Kenji to attempt his way out of the bushes.

“No fair,” Kenji says.

The boy laughs. “Didn’t you think that there’d be consequences if you came into the territory of an enemy agent?”

Kenji makes another grab for his hat, but even though the enemy agent is shorter, he’s fast on his feet, and swings out of the way quickly. “Is this all you’ve got?” he asks, because it’s no good to give a bad impression.

In response, the boy sticks the cap on his head. “I’m claiming your hat as a hostage, in exchange for information.”

Kenji’s shoulders droop. It’s not even his hat—he stole it from Kamasaki-san’s locker. “What do you want to know?”

Without missing a beat, the boy says, “Why did you bother coming here?”

“That’s a stupid question,” Kenji says. “I want to know more—to know _anything_ —about your team. So that my team can beat you.”

“But we’re… we’re not all that good,” the boy says. “I mean, we’re better than last year, but we’ve still got a way to go.”

“So do we,” Kenji says. “Anyway, stuff like that doesn’t matter when you’re on court, you know? It’s who’s best on the day, at the time.”

“Yeah,” the other boy says. “I guess so. Um, can I ask your name?”

Kenji places his hands on his hips. “You can call me Agent K,” he says.

“Okay,” the boy says, “then you can call me Agent E.”

“Do you have any more questions, Agent E?” Kenji asks. “Or will we do an exchange of hostages?”

“You don’t have anything to exchange,” Agent E says. “Unless you want to pick a twig from the bush and claim it’s mine because it grew on my school’s grounds.”

“I have something I can exchange,” Kenji says in a suitably mysterious tone—in fact, all he’s got is his email address, which he would suggest Agent E use liberally if he were ever to want to become a double agent and send a communiqué. But telling Agent E that would be giving the game away.

Agent E hums. “Well, then, did you come here alone?”

“My mission partner Agent T wanted to wait outside,” Kenji says. “He’s boring.”

“Or sensible,” Agent E says. “And how’d you get here?”

“Special transport,” Kenji says. It’s a much more glamorous way to say, “We caught a bus.”

“Of course,” Agent E says, “I’d expect no less—”

He’s interrupted by the gym door swinging open, and an older-looking boy stepping out. “Ennoshita, are you around here or—hey!”

“Daichi-san!” Agent E-for-Ennoshita jumps, pulling the cap off. “I was just talking to a visitor, who, um—”

“I’m compromised!” Kenji yells, breaking into a run. He doesn’t want to stick around for this.

“Wait!” Ennoshita calls. “Your cap!”

Kenji turns just in time to catch the throw as Ennoshita sends the cap flying towards him. “See you ‘round, Agent E!” he shouts back.

He doesn’t stop running until he’s made it over the low wall and across the road to where Aone is waiting. Aone raises an eyebrow in acknowledgement as Kenji, sweating from the sprinting and the heat, pulls his hoodie off and fixes his cap back on his head.

“I was compromised,” he says. “I met a cute enemy agent, though.”

Aone looks sort of confused, so Kenji elaborates. “A boy on their volleyball team,” he says. “He took my cap hostage and interrogated me. I was going to do a hostage exchange, but—ugh, I can’t believe myself! I never even got his email address!”

“You’ll see him at Inter High,” Aone says—and how could Kenji have forgotten that?

He spends the entire bus ride back grinning.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave a comment :V


End file.
